On a lighter note…

Many of you do not know who this is.  A few days ago, I did not even know who he was.  Who you are looking at is Sir ______ ______.  He teaches at Cornell’s renowned School of Hotel Administration and he could very well be the least funny man in Cornell if not all of Ithaca.

As a background, the Cornell’s hotel school offers a cooking class called “Introduction to Culinary Arts.” It’s basically a once a week hands-on cooking course that focuses on the professional approach towards preparation, cooking, and presentation of food.  I had to take that class.

Well, I tried to sign up for this class awhile ago, but the spots filled up too fast.  I didn’t make it.  Registration opened up again yesterday, so I tried to sign up for it hoping there were open spots, but the registrar told me I needed “instructor permission.”  With that in mind, I decided to bestow upon Mr. Norkus the most touching e-mail he had ever seen in hopes of winning his sympathy along with his heart, then he would have no choice but to let me enroll in the course.

Here is the exchange that ensued.

—————————————

from	Edward.a.yip@gmail.com
to	—@—-.—
date	Mon, Jan 18, 2010 at 4:14 PM
subject	Re: HADM2290

Hi Mr. _______,

My name is Edward Yip.  I am a non-hotel grad student and was interested in joining HADM2290 for spring ‘10 semester.  When I tried to enroll, it said I needed instructor permission and so I am writing to inquire as to the availability of this class and if there was any way I could enroll.

As a plea for sympathy, I would like to submit that this is my first and only year at Cornell as I am an M.Eng student in the Biomedical Engineering program.  I have been dating a wonderful girl from California for the past year and a half.  Amongst the many passions we share, one of which happens to be appreciating food.  She is a fine cook whereas I have never had a chance to cultivate my culinary skills, so I thought it would be absolutely splendid if I had an opportunity to go home after graduation and surprise her by preparing her the meal of a lifetime.  I firmly believe that this class paves the path for my dream and if there is any possibility I can join the class, I would very much like to know.

Thank you for your time and consideration.

Regards,
Edward Yip

——————————

from	—@—-.—
to	edward.a.yip@gmail.com
date	Mon, Jan 18, 2010 at 4:14 PM
subject	Re: HADM2290

Following the closure of course enroll, enrollment is managed via wait list that is maintained in Statler, room 243. The wait list for the spring 2010 semester will open on January 21.

—————————————-

Boo Cornell.

Sing Yeah and Me

Sing Yeah: 1998 – 1/04/10

He was always a lively dog. He ran around and played like the best of dogs and always wore his heart on his paw.  If ever unhappy, he would drop a deuce or two anywhere and everywhere to show his discontent.  Yes, he knew what punishment would ensue, but he didn’t care.  He followed one rule and one rule alone: there are no rules.  Damn it, he was Sing Yeah.

Yeah, you could try to play fetch with him, but he would never promise to return the ball or toy to you.  You could try to trust him and leave him unattended for a bit, but he would never promise to not lay his tasty treats in the middle of the room for you.  If he sensed that we were going to put him in the garage, he would run away with the wind on his feet.  If we tried to push him in the garage, he would call upon the earth to hold him in place as he stuck his butt up to our faces.  And even after we managed to get him in the garage, he would miraculously jump over our defenses carried perhaps by his air of defiance.

Never one to obey or accept confinement, he had a steely resolve and an indomitable spirit.  He was a lion that somehow got stuck in a dog’s body.  He was Sing Yeah.

As our noble and gallant protector, whenever someone would drive up to our driveway, Sing Yeah would always jump onto our window ledge, his watchman’s tower, to see if it was friend or foe and alert us accordingly.

And as a Yip, whenever our family would sit at the kitchen table to play family games, I would have him sit on my lap so he could watch.  Rambo would always jump off and waste his life away on the couch, but not Sing Yeah.  Sing Yeah always stayed and watched until he would grow tired, rest his head on the table, and fall asleep as the gentle sounds of his snoring guided the pace of our game.

He died on Jan 4^th after having eaten an abundance of coins, unbeknownst to us, which caused his liver to stop functioning.  Over the course of 2 days, he lost all of the energy and spunk we came to know and love.  Even mentions of going outside or being put in the garage failed to elicit any kind of response.   He could no longer run, and he no longer ate. He was dying.

On Saturday, Jan. 2^nd, my dad and I brought him to one of his favorite places to run around hoping that finally giving him free reign to frolic would bring back the Sing Yeah of old.  Unfortunately, he just stood there weakly, hobbled around for a bit until his hind legs gave out, and then plopped down and just laid there only able to stare at what used to be his domain.  Knowing that his last moments were drawing near, we carried him around to all of his favorite spots so he could enjoy them one last time.

On Sunday, Jan 3^rd, his skin and eyes turned yellow, and he no longer wagged his tail at the sight of my mom, his favorite person in the world.  He could no longer stand on his own and needed me to prop his hind legs up when he needed to go to the bathroom.  I stayed with him as my parents went off to church and stayed with him until they returned.  When they pulled drove their car up to the driveway, I carried Sing Yeah to the window ledge for his final post as our protector.

We took him to the vet later that day to see if there was any chance of a miracle.  I held him in my arms as we drove to the vet, his body uncharacteristically limp.  He panted heavily as the passion and energy in his eyes belied his emaciated body.  When we took him into the vet, he showed what turned out to be his final act of rebellion as he threw his head back and forth and every which way as the technicians tried to attach an IV to him.  We were told there was a 50/50 chance he would live.

On Jan 4^th, the vet called and said that Sing Yeah had died in the morning and had died a peaceful death.

It’s a bit ironic that it was his own disobedience that led to his undoing.  Then again, for a dog that had dedicated his life to a life of rebellion, it seems like this was the most fitting way to go.

He was the best of dogs, he was the worst of dogs.  Untamable as the wind yet as gentle as the breeze, he was Sing Yeah, and he will be missed.  Good bye, buddy.

Good B-eyes!

Well, I’ve been saving this one up for awhile now….for no apparent reason.

I’m taking a break, so I saved my best work for last.  I’ll be back…someday.

Thanks for all your support throughout the year.  Hopefully the comic made you look up references in the Bible or made you pick one up at one point or another.

For all those who took issue with the way I drew my eyes, this one’s for you!

p.s. For those who remembered, there will be one more prize to win…. in 2010… or later.

P00-wn3d

Pinocchi-uh oh!

On Your MARK!

Hello everybody.  No OneSidED this week.  A very lovely guest artist has helped fill in for me this week!  Enjoy! (Mark 10:25)

Poking Around

CONTEST OVER!!!

Well, it turns out that my trivia question was a lot easier than I had anticipated.  There is already a winner, so there’s no sense in keeping the contest going.  I can’t believe people actually subscribe to this blog, but congrats to the people who checked their RSS feed and got it right.

# of views: 100

# of comments: 12

# of hurtful comments: 2

# of right answers: 5

# of winners: 1

CONGRATS TO DANIEL CHENG of Los Altos, CA.

So….

Who knows how long this comic blog will last?  Some have noted its decline in humorousness and artistry over the past few issues while some say I’m still the funniest and cleverest and most handsome boyfriend ever.  Yet, the last thing I want to be is another Garfield, so I’ll stop when the time is right.

Anyway, congrats to Daniel once again and here is what he won: a limited edition special OneSidED picture frame.

Thanks again to all who’ve stuck by OneSidED so far!  There will be ONE MORE CONTEST THIS SUMMER!! (It’ll be much harder next time around, so keep subscribing and keep up the comments!)

CONTEST TIME!

First and foremost, thank you to the loyal fans of this comic blog for all your support and your comments.

So to all ten of you who visit my blog regularly, I have decided to hold the first ever OneSidED comic contest!

The rules are simple: the first to post the correct answer (or closest answer) to the following OneSidED trivia question in the comments section will win the prize!

Question: How many OneSidED comics have been posted since it first started?

Contest ends 7/2/09.  So hurry up!

ONLY ONE try per person!  Good luck.

Alienated